I’ve been reading about marriage, somewhat accidentally, and the idea that keeps popping up is that in marriage both people are subordinate to the relationship.
It’s not what’s good for you or what’s good for your spouse but what’s good for the marriage, the combined being.
And there’s the biblical idea that Adam wasn’t a man but a hermaphroditic being with undifferentiated perfection who was split into male and female. And part of the goal of human beings is to reunite that as the singular unity that reestablishes the initial perfection.
Love it Tommy! Thanks so much for reading. I think it’s so good for humans to continuously immerse themselves in things that are bigger than us. Beautiful things come from that.
Beautiful ring, beautiful box, beautiful ideas and beautiful essay. Thank you for sharing!! Resonated so much with this "Stare into the soul of someone else long enough, and you’ll fall deeper into the abyss of yourself".
Graceeeeeee you’re getting married!!! Congratulations! I’m so happy for you guys :) What a gorgeous ring too!
I’m feeling and resonating with everything you’re saying here. I love that you say that marriage wont strip you of your unique self, it will enhance it. I couldn’t agree more.
I also really resonate with the idea of committing to that person every day, no matter what. It requires real discipline, strength and patience. You can’t just walk away when things get tough. You have to confront challenges head on, and that’s hard! But once you make it through tough times together, you prove that you love each other more than yourself and your grows stronger.
Thank you for sharing this! My wedding anniversary is next week and you inspired to write about my take on marriage too :) <3
Grace... I cannot speak to this without stepping on the eloquence. Your words are deeply wise and establish a devoted and healthy emotional awareness. Hold fast to these principles, your marriage will flourish. Thank you. This has blessed me.
Grace, I will keep commenting like an annoying fanboy. You are one of my favorite writers. Ever. It's a treat to read you. Often. Keep publishing. Please.
"Stare into the soul of someone else long enough, and you’ll fall deeper into the abyss of yourself." this line will haunt me for quite some time. Such a subtle yet powerful way to articulate what love makes to us humans. Thank you for sharing this
I so appreciate this piece building toward the powerful distinction you make between autonomy and freedom. It's sort of like you can't have bravery in the absence of fear. You also can't have freedom in the absence of relationship.
So good Grace.
I’ve been reading about marriage, somewhat accidentally, and the idea that keeps popping up is that in marriage both people are subordinate to the relationship.
It’s not what’s good for you or what’s good for your spouse but what’s good for the marriage, the combined being.
And there’s the biblical idea that Adam wasn’t a man but a hermaphroditic being with undifferentiated perfection who was split into male and female. And part of the goal of human beings is to reunite that as the singular unity that reestablishes the initial perfection.
Love it Tommy! Thanks so much for reading. I think it’s so good for humans to continuously immerse themselves in things that are bigger than us. Beautiful things come from that.
completely agree - things that makes us feel small
My favorite take on this idea is a relationship isn't 50/50. It's 100/100. Both give fully.
Love it. Thanks Grace
Beautiful ring, beautiful box, beautiful ideas and beautiful essay. Thank you for sharing!! Resonated so much with this "Stare into the soul of someone else long enough, and you’ll fall deeper into the abyss of yourself".
Thank you Yehudis!! I’m so glad it resonated 🧡
Graceeeeeee you’re getting married!!! Congratulations! I’m so happy for you guys :) What a gorgeous ring too!
I’m feeling and resonating with everything you’re saying here. I love that you say that marriage wont strip you of your unique self, it will enhance it. I couldn’t agree more.
I also really resonate with the idea of committing to that person every day, no matter what. It requires real discipline, strength and patience. You can’t just walk away when things get tough. You have to confront challenges head on, and that’s hard! But once you make it through tough times together, you prove that you love each other more than yourself and your grows stronger.
Thank you for sharing this! My wedding anniversary is next week and you inspired to write about my take on marriage too :) <3
Well-written Grace. Amen to all of this.
Grace... I cannot speak to this without stepping on the eloquence. Your words are deeply wise and establish a devoted and healthy emotional awareness. Hold fast to these principles, your marriage will flourish. Thank you. This has blessed me.
This is beautiful – we need more voices talking about the value of commitment and marriage. Thanks for sharing!
Grace, I will keep commenting like an annoying fanboy. You are one of my favorite writers. Ever. It's a treat to read you. Often. Keep publishing. Please.
"Stare into the soul of someone else long enough, and you’ll fall deeper into the abyss of yourself." this line will haunt me for quite some time. Such a subtle yet powerful way to articulate what love makes to us humans. Thank you for sharing this
Recommitting to commit with every sunrise. This is so beautiful, Grace. I'm so so happy for you!
I so appreciate this piece building toward the powerful distinction you make between autonomy and freedom. It's sort of like you can't have bravery in the absence of fear. You also can't have freedom in the absence of relationship.